A girl scout leaders guide

So if you are an experienced girl scout leader or girl scout then you know that Juliette Low is the founder of the girl scouts and also that her birthday is on Halloween.  Our service unit has an event every year.  Last year’s event was a costume birthday party all the troops brought cupcakes and the girls decorated them themselves.  They played games like mummy relay and had a costume contest.  We also danced halloween line dances and played death tag.  It was really fun.   The girls were charged a dollar and received a fun patch that said happy birthday Juliette.

This is an event that I threw last year and I am prepping for again this year.  The girls are charged $3.00 and they get to make an ornament, get a nice christmas box to put it in and they also get hot chocolate with a mug they get to take home.  The ornaments are of different difficulties levels so that all girls can make one from daisy to cadette.    Each troop is also asked to bring two dozen cookies.  The girls really enjoy it and they also get to get a fun patch.  Which can be found here

 This event in no way will earn your service unit money but it will allow the event to pay for itself.  Ask your volunteers to help with the supplies as most can be found through recycling.  Here are two of the ornaments we will be making this year are found here….

So I started this blog writing about tv and giving my opinions, but I have found that I do not like writing about tv because i am a bit adhd.  I cannot just sit and watch tv so I have a hard time doing recaps. 

So I have decided to take this in a new direction.  I have been a girl scout leader and event planner for years.  I spend countless hours seaching the web finding resources to use and share with the other leaders I am responsible for.  I want to put all these resources in one area.  I also am going to give tips and how to’s on running a successful troop and service unit.    I welcome all tips from other leaders and certainly would love to hear comments from other service unit administrators.

So here is the first link and tip I give to all the new leaders I recruit and it is a chart that has been put on the web that links all of the daisy petals and the brownie try-its, and the junior badges and the interest projects so you can run a multiage troop. 

Girl Scout Badge Conversion Chart

The new 90210 is not nearly as good as I am sure you have heard.  I was a young teenager when the old one came out so I am sure that the view I had was different then the one I would have today if I watched it.

The  new “Brenda” is not really likeable and the new “Kelly’ is kinda one note.  The only really interesting part is when the old Kelly and Brenda are on. 

I am trying desperatly to like this show but I have to say up against the kids of gossip girl the show is just too tame.

HAs anyone out there watched Samantha Who?  I am loving this show.  This is one of the shows on the air that did not lose its charm after the writers strike.

The premise is simple: a woman named Samantha was not a nice lady.  Then she gets hit by a car and she has amnesia.  She can’t remember anything about her life and as she is learning about her life she realizes how screwed up she is.  She then vows to stop being  a bad person and change her life.  They are doing stunt casting on tonights show with Mary-Kate Olson but it is really not needed the show is great!

I would certainly recomend that anyone out there looking for a light hearted comedy check it out.

Then! Castiel pulled a Cosby on Dean (as in: “I brought you into this world, I can take you out!”) Sam asked Dean to tell him about Hell! Dean lies and tells he doesn’t remember anything! The boys meet Uriel! Uriel informs Sam that he can destroy him whenever he pleases, and that Sam should ask Dean what he remembers of Hell! Exclamation points make everything peppery and shiny!

Now!

A woman is in the shower, eyes closed, when we see a figure sneak up to the shower door. Eerie music plays as the figure, or as much as we can see of him through the glass, leers at her.

As she turns off the water and gets out, the figure vanishes. She looks around for a moment, sensing someone there, then continues to dry off. While she’s wrapping a towel around her head, we see a hand print appear on the shower door’s fogged glass, and footprints on the floor.

The woman finishes drying and tosses her towel behind her, and it lands on what appears to be the head of an invisible man…who she notices in the mirror. She turns around in shock, and an adolescent voice greets. her.

“Ummm…hello Mrs. Armstrong!” Cue the screams. Cue the credits!

Sam and Dean are sitting in a miserable chain restaurant, and Sam asks his brother why Uriel told him to inquire after Dean’s memories of Hell. Dean says he has no idea save for the possibility that Uriel’s a dick, and does a shot. Sam makes Dean look him in the eye and swear. Dean does a great job of feigning annoyance and looks him in the eye.

“I don’t remember a thing from my time down under,” he snappily lies. “I don’t remember, Sam.”

They try to decide where to go from there. It’s been quiet — no demon activity, no seal-breaking fun, standard bogus UFO sightings…except for one possibility of a vengeful spirit at work. Dean gulps his beer.

In Washington, Sam reads, there are reports of a ghost haunting the showers of a women’s health facility. Dean does a spit-take. Sam continues: one woman even says that the spirit threw her down the stairs. Dean rushes to pay the bill. Women? Showers? Dean’s ready to walk.

Mission dateline: Washington. While Dean heads to the health club, Sam meets Candace Armstrong — the woman from the shower — in the town’s Chinese restaurant, and she gives Sam her eyewitness account.

“Once I saw the apparition, that’s when I decided to run.” While she’s talking, Sam notices a nerdy looking guy (OK, it’s Ted Raimi, aka Joxer the Mighty from “Xena”) in the corner making out with an attractive girl. He turns his attention back to the story, in which Mrs. Armstrong amends her tale: The ghost knew her name! She decided to run…and fell down the stairs. Yep, she wasn’t pushed down the stairs, she fell. That’s when the weirdness kicks in: the ghost kept apologizing and helped her up, begging her not to tell his mom.

Sam goes to a very ticked off looking Dean to report the bad news…no ghosts here. But as they’re realizing there won’t be any naked women to save, they notice a tiny kid run by being chased by a bunch of bullies. Dean teases the kid by yelling, “Run, Forrest, run!” Sam insists that there’s nothing going on…when they happen upon a hunter exclaiming very loudly to the town sheriff that he spotted a footprint that could only belong to Bigfoot. Sam and Dean get in on the conversation and get the guy to tell him where it happened. Then realize that what the guy is saying sounds nuts: Bigfoot? Seriously?

Once they get to the purported scene, they see enormous tracks on the ground, tracks belonging to, yes, a very big foot. They follow the tracks into a liquor store, where they find several drained bottles of Amaretto and Irish creme. “He’s a girl drink drunk!” Dean quips. And there’s something else. Bigfoot helped himself to the entire contents of a porno magazine rack…and left a tuft of fur behind.

“I’ll say it again, Dean says. “What the hell is going on in this town?”

They sit down and mull over what they’ve just witnessed - first ghosts in showers, then a porn loving, boozy Bigfoot. Oh, and then! A little girl rides by with a crate on her bike and a periodical falls off in front of Dean and Sam. It happens to be “Busty Asian Beauties.” The girl stops at the liquor store, where she leaves the crate in front of the door with a note saying “Sorry.”

They tail her home, knock on the door, and she answers.

Sam asks the little girl if her parents are home, and she says no. The boys ask if she’s seen a really, really furry –

She cuts Dean off with, “Is he in trouble?”

“No!” says a surprised Sam, adding that they just wanted to make sure he was OK.

“He’s my teddy bear,” the girl says, adding in a whisper, “I think he’s sick.”

Amazing! says Dean, as they fumble to pull out another badge. “We’re teddy bear doctors!” Sam tells her.

They ask to see Teddy. The little girl leads them up to her room. The door is closed — she explains that he’s grumpy. She calls out to Teddy, telling him that she’s brought doctors to help him. She opens the door.

On her bed, watching the news and holding a bottle of booze, is a seven-foot tall and very sad looking teddy bear. Not a guy in a suit — a teddy bear.

“Close the friggin’ door!” he sobs. They comply.

The little girl, who introduces herself as Audrey, explains,”All I ever wanted was teddy that was big, real, and talked. But now he’s sad all the time. Not ouch sad, but ouch in the head sad. He says weird stuff and smells like the bus!” They asked Audrey how teddy became this way, and she said, “I wished for it. At the wishing well.”

They open the door again and talk to Teddy, who is depressed at explosions and sad things he sees on the news, “Can you believe this crap? This is a terrible world! Why am I here?”

“For tea parties!” Audrey yells.

“Tea parties!” the teddy bear sobs. “Is that all there is?”

Sam and Dean close the door and ask Audrey to give them a second. They step away from Audrey and ask how in the hell they execute a full-grown stuffed animal. What, set it on fire? Shoot it? They can’t think of a solution. But as Sam points out, that’s not the main problem.

Sam and Dean turn back to Audrey and ask where her parents are. “My mom wished they were in Bali, so I think they’re in Bali.” Urk.

Sam and Dean inform Audrey that the bear has lollipop disease, and they have to treat it. They get Audrey to stay with the nice neighbor down the street, Mrs. Hurley …but not before telling him where the wishing well is located.

The answer: A Chinese restaurant, and the tiny boy is tossing a coin into the fountain. He has an earnest look on his face.

Sam and Dean consider the well for a moment before Dean decides to test it out. He fishes in his pocket for change as Sam asks what he’s going to wish for. “You’re not supposed to tell,” Dean says with a smile. He tosses in his coin and thinks for a moment, when he’s suddenly interrupted by a delivery guy walking into the restaurant and asking who ordered the foot-long Italian sub with extra jalepenos. Gotta give him credit — he keeps it simple.

He sits down and eats the sub, remarking on its extra-special deliciousness, and reads a newspaper headline about a local man winning $168 million in the lottery. And, again, the geek and his smokin’ hot girlfriend. “That definitely goes on the list,” Dean snarks. The restaurant owner comes over and insists that he doesn’t allow outside food. Dean retorts that they wouldn’t eat any food in that place, pulling out his fake badge and identifying himself, and Sam, as health inspectors. The place has a rat infestation, Dean alleges, spouting a few random numbers that sound like a reasonable health code. Everybody out, including nerd man and hot girl.

Back to the restaurant: Dean tells Sam to take a turn, and he declines. Dean presses him. What would Sammy wish for? Would he wish to go back to his old life, so he could be a big yuppie lawyer with a hot girlfriend, nice car, white picket fence? Sam says no, that it’s impossible for them to go back to their own lives. So, what would he wish for? His dark response: “Lilith’s head on a plate. Bloody.”

Dean looks down into the fountain and sees something other than the pennies: A very old looking coin. He bends down to pick it up, and it won’t budge. They head out to the car and get a crowbar and a sledgehammer to pry it out, and it breaks the their tools. The coin’s magical! Sam takes a rubbing on a piece of paper. Sam gives the paper to Dean and tells him to look into it, because something’s just occurred to him. He runs out.

Back in the ladies’ locker room, a blonde is getting dressed as wet footprints appear behind her. Sam walks in and grabs whatever is walking up by the shoulder — and it becomes visible. It’s a kid! The woman bolts out of the room. Sam chastises the kid, while seeming additionally impressed that the kid can turn his invisibility on and off. He tells him to put some pants on.

Dean, for his part, encounters a gang of boys screaming for mercy and running away…from a much smaller boy. The tiny kid — the same one who visited the well earlier — stops and asks Dean what his problem is. Dean pretends not to have one, and suddenly rubs his loudly rumbling stomach.

Sam catches up with Dean in the motel as he’s puking up his sandwich. Guess what? The wishes go back. See, the coin is Babylonian, marked by Tiamat, a chaos deity. (Props to the D&D crowd!) The deal is that someone throws the coin into a pool, any pool, and it become a wishing well that grants all wishes. But the wishes go sideways. Also if everyone in the town gets their wish, the place descends into chaos. So how to get rid of the coin? They have to find the first wisher, who is the only one who can pull the coin out. And they have to find him soon, because the more wishes that get granted, the greater the chaos that will be inflicted on the town will be.

Meanwhile, back in Audrey’s bedroom, Teddy is sobbing and has written a suicide note - “Life is meaningless. T. Bear.” — on a toy blackboard. A gun is in his mouth, and the camera pans to the wall behind him. There’s a gunshot, and a shower of cottony stuffing. We pan back to see a hole in the back of Teddy’s head…and Teddy, still very much alive. He raises his fist to the skies and howls, “Whyyyy????

Later, Dean is napping and tosses and turns as he has nightmares of Hell. Sam wakes him, and Dean takes a swig of booze. Sam calls his brother on his B.S. and tells him that Uriel was right — he does remember Hell. Sam begs Dean to tell him his scary stories, and Dean plays it off, saying they need to get back to work

So. Giant teddy bear. Lottery guy. Invisible shower pervert. How can they tell who made the first wish?

Dean, looking in the paper, has a pretty good idea of who it is. He sees an engagement announcement for geek boy and hot chick, Wesley Mondale and Hope Lynn Casey. It goes back about a month. Let’s pay them a visit, shall we?

Moments before Sam and Dean visit, Hope is serving Wes a hearty meal because, she says, she just had to. He looks at her somewhat sadly and says he wants her to be happy, so he wants her to start doing things that made her happy before. She frowns and starts to cry, pleading with him not to be angry with her, that she’d just die, that she’d just die! Wes reassures her that it’s OK. The doorbell rings, and it’s Sam and Dean posing as florists. Hope screams in delight and runs out of the room to retrieve her ideas for the wedding.

When she’s out of the room, Sam and Dean notice that Wes happens to be a coin collector. They tell Wes to ‘fess up, saying they know what he’s been up to. He tries to play coy until Hope comes back into the room and starts yammering about flowers. The boys ask her how they met, and Hope tells him that one day last month, it’s like she just saw him for the first time.

“It’s like he was just glowing!” she purrs, and begins lustily pawing at Wesley. He peels her off of him and instructs her to get them coffee.

While she’s in kitchen Wes explains that his grandfather brought the piece back from Africa and told him it was a real wish-making coin. After grampy died, Wesley thought he’d take it out for a spin. So he threw the coin into the fountain, and the rest is history. Dean informs Wes that he has to take the coin out of the fountain and oh, no, Wes is having none of that…even if, as they warn him, failing to do so will sink the town into chaos.

Still, Dean insists that he accompany them to the restaurant. Hope eavesdrops on this conversation in the kitchen.

In the car, the guys ask Wes what the heck he was thinking, and he said he just wished Hope would love him more than anything. “How’s that working out?” Dean deadpans.

Sam points out that their love is twisted, and Wes replies that twisted love is a hell of a lot better than when she didn’t know he was alive. Besides, he adds, what did Sam and Dean know? They’re two good-looking guys who can get whatever they want.

Dean and Sam laugh bitterly, bursting his bubble by telling them they’re miserable, that they have to fight tooth and nail to keep what little they have.

(At some point during this conversation the car seems to have hit something, but Sam, Dean and Wes don’t see anything. They drive on, not seeing the naked invisible kid become visible and, clutching his bare ass, moaning, “Ow….”)

Sam and Dean hit upon the moral of the story: Maybe people aren’t supposed to get everything they want. After all, people who get everything they want have a tendency to lose their minds. “Take a look at Michael Jackson!” Dean points out. “Hmm? Or Hasselhoff!”

Wes still doesn’t get what the big deal is, since he doesn’t see any examples of this, which is right when the car drives up to the tiny boy, Todd, flipping an extra-large S.U.V. with other kids screaming inside of it. “Kneel before Todd!” the kid screams. “Kneel before Todd!”

Dean gets out of the car to reason with little Todd, who tells Dean to get the heck out of his way. Todd is gripped in a rage! He tells Dean that the other kids mercilessly bullied him, until Audrey told him the wishing well worked. He breaks into an evil sneer. Dean tries to lay Spiderman’s “with great power comes great responsibility” line on the kid, and Todd sends him flying into a bunch of trashcans with an uppercut.

Sam and Wesley get to the door of the restaurant, and Wes asks Sam why they can’t just get what they want.

“Because that’s life, Wes,” Sam answers…just as a lightning bolt shoots down from the clear blue sky, knocking Sam out of his shoes and leaving him smoking and very dead on the pavement.

Not far from that scene, Dean walks up to Todd and punches him in the face — and holds his hand in agony. Todd, not at all fazed, grabs Dean by the throat and moves to crush his windpipe.

Inside the restaurant, Hope is standing by the wishing well and confesses that she had to wish Sam dead because he was going to make Wes wish away their love. And, just a reminder, she loves him more than anything. Wes goes to hold her.

“It’s gonna be OK. I’ll make it OK.” He lets her go, and with a bit of trepidation, walks over to the fountain and retrieves the coin. Sam wakes up. Dean gets up and walks over to Todd, who seems to have returned to normal. He fakes being afraid of Todd in front of the bullies so the kid can keep up the act and never be bothered again. Hope’s face transforms from deep emotion to blank. Wesley stands up and looks at her. “Hope?” he asks.

She seems confused. “Do I know you?” She turns and leaves him there, walking out of the restaurant and stopping for a moment to notice Sam. Wesley, his heart crushed, comes out after her and, seeing Sam, hands him the coin.

Later, the boys are sitting on a dock, and Dean is reading a newspaper with a headline that the lottery ticket was a fake. Audrey’s parents are with her, looking very sunburned and traumatized. She’s holding Teddy, who (which?) is now normal size and has a band-aid over the hole in his head. Everything has returned to normal, and Sam reports that the coin has been melted down.

They move to leave, but Dean stops and tells Sam the truth: “You were right. I shouldn’t have lied to you. I do remember everything that happened to me in the pit. Everything.”

Sam nods. “So, tell me about it.”

“No,” Dean said. “I won’t lie anymore, but I’m not going to talk about it.”

San pushes him, and Dean snaps back that a little heart to heart, some sharing and caring, isn’t going to make things better.

“The things I saw, there aren’t words. There is no forgetting. There is no making it better. Because it is right here –” he taps his finger on his temple “– forever. You wouldn’t understand, and I could never make you understand. So, I am sorry. ” Dean looks away. They consider the water for a moment, before walking back to the car.

We open on home video of Sara talking about how she’s been thinking about “us” alot and how she thought “we could survive anything.” We then see Grissom driving in rain at night. Back to Sara talking about how her trip has given her a lot of clarity and how the last year in Vegas she could barely breathe much less think. Grissom arrives at a crime scene.

Katherine is trying to preserve a tire track in the rain. Grissom calls her over to the dead body which is covered by a tarp, thereby contaminating the scene. (A first responder did it.) A trucker spotted the body. Ugh, they uncover the body and it’s face is completely demolished by asphalt. Fingers and toes are gone. An ME determines the body’s only been dead a few hours. Judging by marks on the wrists and the icky face smashing they think the body was tied up and dragged. We cut to shot of that. Grissom says the whole thing should be hamburger then. They roll the body and he wipes off some goo and, shudder, tastes it. Motor oil. He’s thinking the body was tied to the undercarriage of a car. Catherine posits one with high clearance like an SUV. We see a shot of this. He has no ID.

Back to Sara saying that before she left he said some things she tried not to hear, but she thinks he was right. Grissom looks forlorn in the rain.

The body is now back at the lab and Grissom and Nick take pictures. The guy played softball for Talmadge Media according to his shirt. There are also nine stab wounds in it. Grissom grabs his eyes and Nick wonders if he has a migraine. Nick departs and Robbins arrives saying that what happened to his face occured post-mortem and that you can see his brain through his nasal cavities, that’s cool. Robbins departs saying “BRB,” his wife has him into texting.

Grissom washes the body and notices post-mortem rope marks as Nick returns. The stab wounds are post mortem as well. There are also wounds around the dude’s swollen nipples.

Cops walk the scene in daylight. Catherine takes pictures of the tire tracks. Hodges complains his shoes are ruined. He walks to another part of the scene. and looks at a bloody rope. As he goes to grab it, he pricks his finger. Katherine comes over and grabs the rope. She hypothesizes when the rope melted, it broke, the body fell and led the killer to do the accidental desert body dump. (Haven’t we all been there?) Hodges wonders why anyone would go to the bother of tying the body to undercarriage in the first place. Because, she says, if a cop stops you you’re going to look inside the car, not underneath it.

Brass is busting into a house with Nick and Riley. They check around with flashlights. Brass picks up a wallet and finds an ID, the man’s name was Ian Wallace. Turns out the guy was good looking. Riley smells citrus and goes hunting. Nick finds scrape marks on the wall in another room and a blood drop. We see a vision of Wallace getting punched in the mouth and his bloody saliva flinging on to the wall. Riley is blue-lighting a chair with more blood on it.

Back at the lab tox screens show the guy had low levels of pot and booze in his system, but not via IV injection in his nipples.

Grissom opens a video clip of Sara in his email, it’s the video we were seeing earlier. She’s on a trip south of the equator, at sea with other scientists, students, activists. Apparently, it’s pretty thrilling. She says she wishes they could talk in person. She apologizes for being out of touch. And then we pick back up on her thoughts from the top of the show. She says for the first time in a long time, she’s happy.

Back at Ian’s house they’re still looking around. Nick poked around the garage, where Ian could’ve been tied up. The door was also unlocked. Riley’s determined Ian lived with a girl thanks to the napkin holders and heart-shaped pillows. Nick wonders where she is. Riley wonders if she roped him to the bottom of her truck. On one of the womens’ magazines they get her name: Justine Stefani. (I’m sure she’s going to think this stuff is bananas.)

Back at the lab Robbins is slicing up Ian and doing tests on his skin and stuff. Nipple punctures rule out drug use. They don’t know what’s up with them. He also has some weird grill marks on his tongue. Torture. Also he was strangled. S&M gone wrong, they’re now thinking. The stab wounds are brutal, random, and post-mortem which is inconsistent with S&M. But since you can’t take pleasure in someone’s pain when they’re dead, that’s the gone wrong part. Grissom walks away purposefully and without comment. Catherine asks Hodges if that’s normal. Grissom being socially awkward? That’s normal he says. She laments that he won’t talk to her and doesn’t appear to be sleeping much.

Grissom goes to see Lady Heather. It’s still raining. She’s surprised to see him. He apologizes for not calling. She asks what he wants. She brings him coffee and asks when he last had a good night’s sleep. He says simply bad dreams. He explains about Ian Wallace and the S&M wounds and what her first impressions might be. She says her first impression is he’s changed. He asks after her and she says she got her masters in psychology last year and she now has patients, not clients. He guesses she specializes in sex therapy.

She looks over the photos and says the nipple wounds are from “needle play.” She says it’s called stacking. She asks if she can touch him and outlines over his shirt how it worked. (So the victim was a submissive, surmises Grissom). He asks about the tongue grilling. She explains she never used electricity above the waist but that some people do and these are masochistic injuries created by wrapping chopsticks around the tongue and shooting juice through them. (So they’re looking for a dominant, asks Grissom). He says they don’t know if his girlfriend was into the lifestyle since she’s missing. Heather wants to see photos of their bedroom.

Back at the house Riley, Nick, and now Greg, are in said bedroom. Grissom has called and asked them to look for S&M toys. Greg finds a “booty smudge” on the TV and blue lights semen. Riley finds a picture of the happy couple, Justine got a boob job. She also finds a trunk under the bed full of S&M stuff. Greg comes over and Riley asks if he’s ever been tied up. He asks what she thinks and she says he’s probably more into hair pulling. Nick, who has gone to investigate the closet, tells them to knock it off and take pictures of the stuff.

In the closet there’s a bloody shirt in the laundry basket that matches the nipple stains. Greg thinks he changed before he was killed but Riley points out the girlfriend could’ve redressed him. Nick wonders how Justine tied him to the car then. Riley says she could do it, that it takes brains not brawn. Nick doubts she could. Greg thinks she could, including the killing part.

Back at Lady Heather’s she’s looking at pictures of the apartment and determining he didn’t play at home since there’s no dedicated S&M room to see. Grissom wonders if he went to see a pro. There’s a photo of a flyer for a club called Lower Linx. She says it’s part of the amateur scene but has a well-equipped back room that rents by the hour if you know the right people.

Cut to Lower Linx and its red walls and skeevy dudes leaning on them as Nick and Brass enter. A few people dance on a sparsely populated floor. They approach a hot chick at the bar. She’s the owner. They show her photos of Ian and Justine. No recognition. She has no security cameras. Nick and Brass ask to see the back room. She tells them to get a warrant. They threaten to wait and she shows it to them. It’s like an S&M operating room with ceiling chains over a table, an oscilloscope, needles, chopsticks etc.

At the lab Wendy explains to Riley that the semen on the TV was his but the um, female secretions, weren’t Justine’s. Riley thinks Justine found him cheating and offed him. Turns out he also has blood on the back of his shirt, they think this might be from the killer.

Back to the Sara video she’s saying Grissom was right, if a relationship can’t move forward it withers. Cut to Grissom looking out Heather’s rainy window. She’s explaining that there was a schism between Ian and Justine. She says Justine was a good girl, based on the photos, and Ian was a compartmentalizer and his dark side was hidden away. Heather asks if Sara knows Grissom is here. He says no. She asks if she’s his secret. He says no, and she’s not his therapist either. Back to the case Grissom says they found evidence Ian had sex with another woman in the house. That’s his subconscious desire to get caught by his mommy figure, Justine. Heather says Justine’s an enabler not a dominant. Even if she discovered him cheating she couldn’t kill the guy, says Heather.

Catherine, Greg, and Brass discover a burned out car with a burned out corpse in it 20 miles from the original crime scen. (God this episode is gruesome.) It’s Justine Stefani, based on the car registration and the nearly intact implants. So now their suspect is a victim.

Back at the lab, Robbins and Phillips confirm it’s Justine. They roll the body and discover she was bound.

At the lab Riley, Catherine, Nick, and Greg go over the evidence: footprints, tire impressions that indicate someone chased a bound Justine with the car. Her boots were found under the car. She was hit by the car, the killer put her in the car and torched it because the car was undriveable. The killer walked back to the road and either drove himself away or had an accomplice. They figure she was kidnapped. So whatever started at Lower Linx ended at their house where Justine might’ve walked in on them.

Nick offers secretions on chopsticks that belonged to another woman and he suspects the bar owner, Ms. Tornee, off whom he got a “dominatrix vibe.” He says she and Lady Heather could be sisters. Riley wonders who Lady Heather is. Greg smirks and says that’s a whole other “Oprah.” Catherine asks Nick to get her DNA. Greg also says they have a lead on another suspect, the man who last called Justine.

He’s Martin Devlin and he’s sucking up to Brass during his interrogation, repeatedly calling him “Jim.” He claims he just tried to sell her life insurance. When Brass can’t get anything out of him Devlin tries to sell him insurance.

Lady Heather is serving tea and explaining about dominance fantasies to Grissom. He says they know he had a female dominant but that she slept with Wallace. Lady Heather tsks, tsks that. He explains the two perp theory. She says the dominatrix would’ve picked one of her trusted slaves, one who may have played “scenes” with her in which they share fetishes.

Nick questions a surly Ms. Tournee who calls her back room clients freaks and that she doesn’t practice it,she’s an entrepreneur, she majored in theatre. She did sleep with Ian but not at his house and she didn’t kill him. She resists the DNA swab, the cop in the room forces her to sit and take it and Nick swabs her mouth. She accuses him of being aroused by it.

So the stain Wendy found on Ian’s shirt has a close match to a convicted felon named Devlin. Riley and Brass pull Devlin back in and offer up evidence. His hot blond lawyer offers counter measures. They don’t need a warrant to make him open his shirt. He does and he has needle play marks around his nipples and he has tell tale marks on his tongue. They go in for the kill saying he and Tournee followed Ian home and got in a fight, they killed him, called Justine to frame her, tied him to the car and then things got weird, the body fell, Justine ran away, they set her on fire. He says to stop. His lawyer calls it off.

Lady Heather says the post-mortem stab wounds are the work of a sexual sadist. She says they tend to be loners and can’t usually get into regular S&M roles with safe words. Her opinion is the S&M was separate from the murders. She makes the personal observation that everything she’s told him he could’ve read in a book and that he’s there for a more personal reason.

Back to the Sara video and her remarks about relationships withering. She said she’d been waiting for him to decide but that not making a decision is making a decision. Lady Heather asks where Sara is.

Grissom tells her about everything during the commercial break and she asks him why he didn’t go with her. He says it was out of his control. She echoes Sara’s “not making a decision” comment and we go back to the Sara video and her telling him not to worry about her anymore, she’s good and she thinks they’re better off this way. Heather says she thinks that Grissom is here because it’s the only place that doesn’t remind him of Sara. She says she has a guest room upstairs and he can stay as long as he wants.

Looking at Devlin’s SIMM card at the lab they find a texted photo of … his lawyer, in a clinch with Ian.

Brass interrogates the lawyer, she finally gives up that she slept with Ian but left after the photo was taken. Turns out she, Devlin, and Ian had played a scene at the Lower Linx, she got turned on and went to Ian’s and slept with him.

Page last updated by brayvalentine, 1 hour ago

Will Brennan and Booth finally get together? Unlikely. Will a dead body be found in the opening moments? Almost certainly.

Sure enough, two drunk kids scale a fence to a junk lot in search of spare car parts. They find a car crushed into a cube and … bleeding? Sure enough, a decomposing human head sits inside. Body found.

Cut to a bar, where Angela and Sweets have met for a drink. Angela explains that she misses sex since breaking up with Hodgins but is no floozy. “I do require an emotional connection,” she explains. Sweets suggests that Angela is simply protecting herself from the chance of emotional pain. She agrees. “It’s time to move on,” she says. Does that mean Sweets is about to get lucky? Hardly.

Booth and Brennan head out to the address where the crushed car originated. Booth jimmies the lock and lets the pair inside a vast warehouse. Dozens of crushed cars rest on the concrete floor — as does a pool of blood. A severe-looking woman wearing Kabuki makeup emerges from the back.

“What the hell are you supposed to be?” Booth asks.

A curator, actually. Turns out the cubed cars are sculptures made by an artist named Jeffrey. The severe woman warns Booth that the FBI will be liable if the pieces are damaged. The victim’s young assistant, Roxy, approaches. She wonders aloud if Jeffrey might have finally “done it” — i.e. made himself part of his artwork. “The ultimate artistic act,” says the severe woman. Brennan shows a photo of the victim’s hand. Roxy identifies the distinctive ring in the picture as belonging to Jeffrey. Looks like a suicide/ artistic statement. Or is it?

Back at the lab, the team is dismayed to discover that a federal judge has declared the evidence a “historic work of art” — trapped body and all. Angela, meanwhile, recognizes Roxy, who has come along with the severe woman to protect the art. Turns out Angela and Roxy went to college together. The two embrace.

Booth and Brennan, meanwhile, arrive to interview Anton, an artist and Jeffery’s rival. Not surprisingly, the man denies all knowledge of the case. “I’d look at his girlfriend if I were you,” Anton says. The girlfriend, according to Anton, is none other than Roxy.

Second later, Booth is in the interrogation room questioning the assistant, who was the sole heir to Jeffrey’s millions. Roxy, however, denies a sexual relationship with her former boss. “I’m a lesbian,” she says. “I’ve never been with a man in my life and I never will.”

Later, Angela confirms as much. Turns out she has first-hand knowledge, in fact. “We were together for over a year,” Angela says. Booth, after duly noting that he has already imagined the two women in bed, wonders aloud if Roxy could kill someone. Angela instantly becomes defensive, insisting the case is a clear-cut suicide.

Back at the lab, Camille and Daisy, using a fancy surgical-like camera, have discovered fractures on the victim’s bones. The result of the crushing process or an attack?

Angela visits Roxy’s loft — and finds that the artist still has a nude portrait of the investigator. The two flirt — but stop short of making out. Angela leaves when an idea of how to clear her former gal pal suddenly pops into ther brain.

Back at the lab, Angela introduces a scanner used on boxcars that will allow the team to digitally recreate what is inside the mass of glass and steel. One scan later, Angela displays the results to Brennan and Booth in an impressive holographic laser light show that seems to have been lifted from “CSI: Miami.” “His bones sustained 88 fractures, all of which can be explained by the crushing of the car,” Angela says. So it was suicide, after all.

Or maybe not. Brennan notices an 89th fracture — and it that wasn’t caused by the crusher. In fact, the fracture on the man’s skull looks an awful lot like an inflicted wound. Angela is crestfallen. “I wanted to prove it wasn’t murder,” she says. Brennan is typically and cluelessly unsympathetic. “But it is,” she comments. Thanks, Bones.

The proof of murder changes everything. No longer a piece of art but an honest-to-goodness murder scene, the “sculpture” can now be legally cracked open. Hodgins does the honors and Brennan tells Daisy to lift out the skull “very, very carefully.” Daisy tries, but manages to squeeze too hard and crush the skull into dozens of pieces. Brennan sighs. She’ll be up late reassembling poor Jeffrey’s head.

Sure enough, hours pass and Brennan is STILL gluing Humpty Dumpty back together again. As she is fitting in the final piece, Angela enters and explains that her relationship with Roxy was “very intense.” When they broke up, Roxy threatened to quit her day job and move to Europe. Brennan, whose literal mind struggles to form sympathetic words, opts instead to make an informed guess on the possible murder weapon.

“I’m almost certain that the death blow came from a common fire axe,” she says.

Booth and Brennan head back to the artist’s warehouse, where the severe woman — who Anton called “that Kabuki ghoul Helen” — angrily accuses them of ruining her business. The investigators discover traces of blood on the floor. The pattern indicates that someone — a small person not strong enough to carry the body — rolled the victim across the floor to the loading dock and into a waiting car. They also find a fire axe. Unfortunately, Helen has no motive. Why would she kill an artist who is bringing in so much money?

It all points back to recently-flush-with-cash Roxy.

Back at the lab, Hodgins discovers sweat on the fire axe. The pH levels indicate that whoever wiped down the axe with turpentine was a woman. Daisy suggested trying to match the sweat on the axe with that of “Angela’s lesbian lover.” But wait! Hodgins has a better idea. He analyzes the sweat once more and discovers that the murderer has a form of leukemia. Moreover, the murderer’s skin would be discolored — automatically excluding Roxy as a suspect.

Hmm. Who have we met in the last hour whose skin is discolored. Or better yet, who wears white Kabuki makeup that would hide it?

If you answered “Helen,” then pat yourself on the back. Booth interrogates the woman, who insists that it wouldn’t make financial sense to kill Jeffery. Booth, showing a surprisingly astute knowledge of the art world, counters that the artist’s death would only increase the value of the sculptures. Brennan points out that Helen recently called an expensive clinic in Mexico looking for a cure for her disease. Turns out the woman not only needed the money, but needed it quickly. Helen breaks down, saying she did the depressed Jeffrey a “favor.”

“Maybe he wanted to live,” Booth says.

“So do I,” a crying Helen says.

Case closed. Now it’s play time.

Back at Roxy’s place, Angela and her former lover celebrate by making out. The scene tastefully fades to black.

Back at the lab, Sweets prepares to fire Daisy on Camille’s orders. Turns out the mousy woman is just too darn annoying to work with the rest of the team. Sweets explains that he has “good news and bad news.” The bad news is that no one likes Daisy and she needs to find a new job. The good news: “There’s absolutely no reason for us to be discreet about our relationship anymore.” The two kiss.

Booth, Brennan and Camille — watching from the floor above — are SHOCKED. Brennan argues that the relationship will not last as Daisy is a woman of science and Sweets makes his living as a psychologist. Booth agrees, saying every relationship needs common ground. Brennan gives Booth an odd, longing look.

Could another shocking kiss be too far away?

Ted’s wedding day didn’t go according to plan after Stella took off. But Ted insisted he’d come out of it stronger and wasn’t thinking about her anymore. “That’s what time does, I guess,” he told his friends after thanking them for getting him through it. Lily reminded him the wedding was yesterday. Ted went to play Kool & the Gang on the jukebox while Barney mused that Stella might have made the right choice. Barney thought Ted, too, had pulled off “the greatest train dodge since ‘Stand By Me’ — well, not the first kid, but the rest of them.”

Two weeks later, his friends were mad that he wasn’t letting them help him out. Marshall wanted Ted to explode. The group talked about where to eat, but Ted shot down every suggestion because it was either too close to Stella’s gym, her office or her mother’s house. Ted had made a map of New York City with all the places he could go because they were out of Stella’s radius. Ted said that he and all Ohioans avoid confronting awkward situations until they go away.

Lily remembered a tapas place someone told her about that was in “the white zone.” They went there and she couldn’t remember who told her — until she did… after Stella walked in.

Ted panicked and the whole group hid under their table while Stella waited for her take-out order. Lily gave Ted a hard time for hiding from Stella, but he told her there was someone she’d hide from, too: “Gasser.” He was a kid named Mike Sasser who she sat next to in ninth grade. She blamed him for passing gas in class when it was really her, and he was made fun of so much that he had to move to a different school.

Barney, too, gave Ted a hard time for hiding from Stella and claimed there wasn’t anyone he’d hide from, until Ted mentioned Becca DeLucci, a woman in a federal prison who Barney used to visit, conjugally. During his last visit, he messed things up by flirting with another inmate during one of his visits and getting her caught in a fight. Barney said he now gets letters from her, saying she’s going to get him the day she gets out of prison and hang his eyes from her rear-view mirror.

They checked to see if all was clear and Stella appeared to be gone, so they took their seats again when, sure enough, she re-emerged.

They all hid under the table again — except for Barney, who was hiding under another table where a group of ladies were having dinner. Robin said she wouldn’t want to speak to the last person she’d want to see walk into the restaurant — her dad — walked in. She talked about how he always wanted a son and that her full name is actually Robin Charles Scherbatsky Jr. She had a lot bottled up that she wanted to say, but didn’t have a chance. Ted realized that while all of his friends were also haunted, it wasn’t too late for him. He was going to talk to Stella. But by the time he came out from under the table, Stella was gone. He tried to chase her out of the restaurant, but her cab pulled away as he ran outside.

They all jumped into another cab and followed Stella’s. Ted said he wanted to talk to Stella like an adult, but Marshall wanted him to get mad. Marshall told Ted that Stella hated “Star Wars.” It didn’t work.

But when they realized that Stella was going home to Tony’s apartment downtown, Ted got angry. He pieced together that she moved to New York to be with Tony but she was going to make him move to New Jersey. Ted got mad, he yelled, he pulled the window crank off the cab door.

Lily told Ted to really think about what he was going to tell her. Ted said he knew exactly what he was going to tell her. We saw Stella get out of her cab and Ted walked up behind her and told her she picked the wrong guy and that she was going to regret it. “All you’re going to do is go in there and start your crappy, disappointing life that is not going to be nearly as happy as the one you would’ve had with me.” He told wasn’t trying to win her back, but wanted her to know that she was making a huge mistake. She said, “I know.” But that was only what he told his friends he was going to tell her.

Ted got out of the cab ready to say all of that, but then… “It all just went away,” old Ted said, after he saw Stella come home to Tony and her daughter Lucy. That was when he decided to let his anger go. “And that, kids, was the perfect ending to a perfect love story,” old Ted said. “It just wasn’t mine. Mine was still out there, waiting for me.”

Page last updated by WerewolfBarMitzvah, 1 day ago

Miami. Day. Inside a high-rise building. Calleigh and Eric pay a visit to William Campbell, who flatly refuses to testify in an upcoming case. Eric is less than pleased. “If you don’t take the stand, we can’t indict Joey Salucci,” he explains. “We can’t try him for murder.” Calleigh assures Campbell that he will be kept safe from the most infamous gangster in Miami. “You win,” Campbell says. He will testify after all.

Calleigh and Campbell run through the testimony. Campbell entered a club restroom and saw a man named A.J. Watkins. After Campbell went into the stall, he overheard a man enter the bathroom, mention the name Joey Salucci and then shoot. When Campbell emerged sometime later, Watkins’ body was gone. That’s why Campbell’s testimony is so crucial: the victim’s body was never found.

Suddenly, the shadow of a massive crane can be seen approaching the windows. Before you can say “Spider-Man 3,” the crane rips through the window, crushing everything in its path. Calleigh and Eric run — but Campbell isn’t so lucky. He slips through a gash in the floor and is impaled on a steel cable.

YEEE-OWWW!!! Cue opening credits!

Caine arrives at the scene, clutching a pair of sunglasses. He knows who is responsible: Joey Salucci. “And he just used the biggest murder weapon in Miami,” Caine growls. But how to prove it? Calleigh interviews the construction manager, who says he pulled the plug on the site a week prior. The man admits to knowing Salucci but refuses any knowledge of a criminal plot. “Don’t go far,” Calleigh warns.

Caine, meanwhile, has gone to visit Salucci at the grave of the criminal mastermind’s daughter. “Nobody should ever lose a child,” Caine growls. In a grainy FLASHBACK, we see that the girl died in a four-wheeler accident on the beach. The man riding four wheelers with Salucci’s pride and joy was none other than A.J. Watkins. In fact, it was Watkins’ four wheeler that crushed the young, connected woman. Back in the present, Salucci grins, claiming that news of Watkins’ death is “news to me.” Caine isn’t buying it — and neither are we.

Back at the scene, Ryan searches the crane operator’s seat frin some few hundred feet above the ground. He notices a “black box” device that records all of the crane’s movements as well as a red streak on the wall. “I think we got some blood up here,” he says.

Natalia, after some off-screen fancy lab work, pulls up a profile. The blood belongs to a Kurt Greenfield, who has a long list of priors. Seconds later, Greenfield is in the hot seat. Not surprisingly, the suspect denies all knowledge of the incident. Greenfield admits to working at the construction site up until a week ago. He explains that he snuck back into the crane cab to retrieve his “uppers” — but that’s it. “You gotta believe me,” he says.

“Mr. Greenfield, I don’t have to do anything,” Caine growls.

In the meantime, Campbell’s widow and son confront Calleigh and Eric, blaming the CSI officers for the death of their loved one. “We’re going to find who did this, “Eric vows — but Mrs. Campbell wants nothing to do with his guarantees. She slaps Calleigh across the face for good measure. “I won’t make the same mistake twice,” she spits.

One too-long commercial break later, Calleigh works the crime scene with Ryan. They notice a pair of fresh tire tracks — odd as the site has been shut down for some time. Ryan also finds shattered glass flecked with auto paint. One super-cool computer montage later, the team discovers that the tire tracks belongs to a BMW convertible registered to Mick Ragosa, a known associate of Joey Salucci. Now THAT’s police work.

Second later, Caine and Frank pull over Ragosa, who drives just such a car. Ragosa says he plays poker with Salucci “from time to time,” but that’s it. Frank isn’t buying it — and tells the goon in not-so-subtle terms. Ragosa finally admits to following Campbell to the safe house “when suddenly it started raining glass.” Just a henchman in the wrong place at the wrong time? Caine lets the man go … for now.

Back at the lab, Natalia examines the black box and discovers that the manual controls for the crane never moved. “So the crane was being remotely operated,” she explains to the inattentive viewer. Bartlett explains that the crane could only be operated in such a way from a 500-foot radius. And wouldn’t you know it? A parking structure just down the street would offer the perfect vantage point.

Calleigh and Eric investigate the parking structure. And wouldn’t you know it? They find the bulky remote in a rooftop trashcan. One super-cool montage later, Valera discovers shocking news: skin fragments left on the remote belong to Campbell’s son! Say it so, Valera!

Before you can say “stunning plot twist,” Calleigh brings Noah Campbell in for questioning. “I didn’t mean to, I swear,” he says. “When he decided to testify, he made that decision all by himself … the witness protection program? I have a life! Friends!” So, basically, junior learned to operate a crane on the Internet, swiped a remote and got to work. Only things went wrong. Noah only wanted to scare dad so he wouldn’t testify. The boy never meant to kill pops. But he did. Oops.

Case closed, right? Don’t bet on it. A certain presumed dead man named A.J. Watkins STILL doesn’t have a murderer. Caine, wearing sunglasses, all but promises a gloating Salucci that the killer will be brought to justice — and it’s not wise to argue with a man in sunglasses that damn cool.

Caine immediately gets to work, telling Eric to request a recording of the 911 call that Campbell made from the club restroom. Eric smiles. Why didn’t anyone else think of that? A short time later, Calleigh and Bartlett analyze the call and discover the sound of a flushing toilet. “So the killer shoots and then takes a bathroom break?” Bartlett asks. Says Calleigh: “No. He was flushing evidence.”

Natalia and Ryan arrive at the club to investigate the bathroom. They sink a camera into the toilet bowl and quickly spot a nine-millimeter shell casing. Now it’s Caines turn to perform some fancy lab work. He uncovers a print on the casing belonging to none other than Mick Ragosa.

Seconds later, Ragosa finds himself in the interrogation room. Caine explains that the henchman’s prints were found on a bullet casing at the scene. In a FLASHBACK, we see Ragosa shooting Watkins and then flushing the bullet. As faithful viewers know, flashbacks never lie. Still: no body, no case. “Good luck pinning anything on me,” Ragosa quips. Growls Caine: “Stick around, Mick.”

Calleigh and Ryan take a closer look at Ragosa’s car. They hope to prove that the same car was used to transport Watkins’ body. Indeed, the duo finds a veritable “murder kit” in the trunk — shovel, rope, tape, etc. One super-cool montage later, Ryan discovers burnt sand on the edge of the shovel. He theorizes that Watkins was buried on a beach near a bonfire. Caine’s eyes light up. Was Salucci actually stupid enough to bury the body where his daughter died? A certain sunglasses-wearing cop certainly thinks so — and so do we.

Not long after, Watkins body is found. But the cause of death wasn’t a gunshot. Watkins, as it turns out, has one bullet wound in his kneecap. No, poor A.J. died of strangulation. Calleigh finds residue on Watkins’ neck — pollen from a lily. Caine’s eyes light up again. Salucci was placing lilies on his daughters grave just the other day.

Salucci is brought in for questioning. “Mick started the job on A.J., but you finished it off,” Caine growls. We see just that scenario in a FLASHBACK: an injured Watkins begs for his life in the sand before Salucci strangles him. “He had to answer for what he did,” Salucci says. Growls Caine: “So do you.”

CSI 1, Salucci 0.